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  • Yugo Jokes

    Q. What do you call a Yugo in a car junkyard?
    A. A blessing.

    Q. How do you double the value of a Yugo?
    A. Fill the Tank

    Q. What do you call a Yugo at the top of a hill?
    A. A miracle

    Q. How do you make a Yugo accelerate from zero to 60 mph in less than 15 seconds?
    A. Push it off a cliff.

    Q. What is found on the last two pages of every Yugo owner's manual?
    A. The bus schedule.

    Q. What did the parts dealer say when the customer said, "I'll take a set of wiper blades for my Yugo"?
    A. "Sounds like a fair trade to me."


    Q. Why do Yugos come with heated rear windows?
    A. To keep your hands warm while you're pushing them


    Q. What do you call a Yugo with brakes?
    A. Customized.


    Q. How do you make a Yugo go faster downhill?
    A. Turn off the engine.


    Q. Why don't Yugos sustain much damage in a front-end collision?
    A. The tow truck takes most of the impact.


    Q. What do you call Yugo passengers?
    A. Shock absorbers


    Q. How do you improve the appearance of a Yugo?
    A. Park it between two 914s.


    You go. Car stays.


    Q. What do you call a Yugo in the fast lane of a highway?
    A. A miracle!
    A. Roadkill


    Some used car dealers might try to reduce the miles on the odometer to make a car seem worth more money.
    With a Yugo, they add miles to try and convince you it really will go that far!


    "Optimist" defined: A Yugo owner with a radar detector

    Q. Why do Yugo owners never carry a map?
    A. It'll never get far enough to get lost!


    Despite their small size, Yugos are actually designed for five people;
    1 person sits in the driver's seat, and the other four would get out and push.

    A thief caused $39.95 damage to a Yugo.
    He broke in and stole "The Club" off the steering wheel.


    Q. Do you know what you call a Yugo station wagon?
    A. We-all-go


    Did you hear about the Yugo/pedestrian accident?
    ...Poor Yugo.


    "You know what they do with junked Yugo's don't you?
    They recycle them into tin cans."


    Here is a true saying in Croatian, which was very popular, where the car comes from (and it rhymes): "Yugo nije za dugo."
    ...Translation: "Yugo is not for long."


    "Yugo missed out on a great slogan when Doritos took it first:
    'Crunch all you want. We'll make more!'


    Q. What's the difference between a Yugo and the principal's office?
    A. It's less embarrassing if your friends see you leaving the principal's office.


    Q: What is the sport-version of Yugo?
    A: The driver wears Nike shoes.


    Q: What do you call a Yugo with twin exhausts?
    A: A wheelbarrow


    Q: What is the Yugo owner's most ardent wish?
    A: To buy a car.


    Q: What do you have to do if your Yugo gets in the way of a swarm of killer bees?
    A: Stop pushing and take refuge into the car.


    Q: What do you call a Yugo with a seat belt?
    A: A rucksack


    Q: How do you make a Yugo go faster uphill?
    A: Throw out the passenger.


    Q: What do you call a Yugo with a flat tire?
    A: A write off.


    Yugo has announced a new 16 Valve model for 2002.
    8 in the engine, 8 in the radio.


    - I can see you've got a new car - a Yugo!
    - Yes, I won the second prize in a lottery.
    - What was the first prize then?
    - A fruit-basket!


    Yugo will be introducing three new vehicles next year.
    They will have a moped called an "I Go".
    They will have a 4-door called a "We Go".
    They will also have a new station wagon called the "Y'all Go".


    Why were sidewalks invented?
    So Yugo owners would have a safe place to walk home.!


    What is the difference between a golf ball and a Yugo?
    You can drive a golf ball 200 yards!


    Q: What do Yugos have in common with Ferarris?
    A: A Ferrari can go from 0 to 60 in 4 seconds, whereas a Yugo can go from 0 to 4 in 60 seconds.


    "The Oakland Police captured two men in their Yugo last night.
    The men are being held as suspects in the city's first push-by shooting."


    From the Yugo owner's manual:
    "If you sense an impending accident with any other animate or inanimate object larger than a breadbox, quickly 1) place head between legs, 2) lock hands behind head, 3) Repeat:
    'Our Father, who art in heaven...'"


    Consumer safety tests showed that a 5 mph parking-lot crash will cause about $2800 damage to a Yugo. What's left?
    About $1200 of "dealer prep."

  • #2
    nice but i did a google search to find out what a yugo was and got a picture of a naked fat guy.

    Comment


    • #3
      in 1990, I was a factory trained yugo technician, one of 5 in my class, probably 1 of 10 in the country! It was amusing, to say the least!

      Comment


      • #4
        over here in europe they still sell some of those things but fortunately not in germany, thanks to safety and emission regs...
        did you know that they made a convertible as well? much heavier and the same "engine"...

        Comment


        • #5
          the city's first push-by shooting.

          Gotta love it!

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by tomsjeep

            Gotta love it!
            you watch mind of mencia?

            Comment


            • #7
              mind of mencia
              Never heard of it.
              Is that a tv program?

              Comment


              • #8
                ya. it's on comedy central. your horse thing and the first drive-by push was kind of like a thing on the show. he, a hispanic comedian, went to a renaissance festival and watched jousting. he made fun of that white people start drive-bys with jousting. also, he said the cloth on the horses was like rims on a car. you'd have to see it for it to be funny.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Could I borrow that for a minute...

                  Anyone know a Yugo forum I could join for about 1 minute total for one post which I'm stealing from Fubar? I'm guessing they don't have a "joke" thread like we do for obvious reasons, so, I'll post it in the "New User Introduction Thread" section with a handle like maybe, "Ugo2Hell"

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by tj2go
                    Anyone know a Yugo forum I could join for about 1 minute total for one post which I'm stealing from Fubar? I'm guessing they don't have a "joke" thread like we do for obvious reasons, so, I'll post it in the "New User Introduction Thread" section with a handle like maybe, "Ugo2Hell"

                    *lol*
                    you're such a good kid ;o)
                    I'd like to see their faces...

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      More Yugo humor

                      How did they come up with the name "Yugo"?
                      Two engineers were overheard saying, "Yugo push, I go steer"

                      Why was there never a long distance Yugo evaluation?
                      After 3 hernias and 2 severe muscle pulls, the Yugoslavian weightlifting team decided that they had had enough injuries.

                      What is the difference between a Yugo and a lawn ornament?
                      The lawn ornament is easier to move around the yard.

                      It has been rumored that a running Yugo in the United States can quailify for protection under the Endangered Species Act.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Osprey
                        How did they come up with the name "Yugo"?
                        Two engineers were overheard saying, "Yugo push, I go steer"

                        Why was there never a long distance Yugo evaluation?
                        After 3 hernias and 2 severe muscle pulls, the Yugoslavian weightlifting team decided that they had had enough injuries.

                        What is the difference between a Yugo and a lawn ornament?
                        The lawn ornament is easier to move around the yard.

                        It has been rumored that a running Yugo in the United States can quailify for protection under the Endangered Species Act.

                        those are good!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Thats funny Fubar but a lot of the younger set here prob don't even know what a Yugo is.
                          I heard one of thoses list for collage profs. getting freashmen and it said they never heard of AMC. no Pacers, Javlins. Getting old sucks

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            "Getting old sucks"

                            Consider the alternative!

                            Then, again, I'm not aware of anyone coming back and COMPLAINING about being dead, so maybe, just maybe..............................

                            Comment

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